When people think of a program which deals with stress they think of stress management. What I offer is very different.
The difference between stress management and stress resolution is this:
Stress management says: we cannot get rid of stress so therefore we are going to give you tools to massage it and put it over there instead of being here. And, inevitably, they will give you tons of techniques to instigate when a stressor trigger is activated, to feel better. This approach means that you will always be stressed and be coming from a place below the line, i.e. from a stressed position and will always be trying to get into a more preferred positive state.
Stress resolution – my approach says: if you can get to the real underlying cause of your stress and deal with that then you will gain mastery over how you respond to stress. Stress resolution also says: let’s just do one thing at a time, really well, which will have the biggest change in your life.
There are 2 real causes of stress so far identified:
- How you respond to stress and
- the beliefs, attitudes, feelings and emotions that drive your deep-seated stress.
What stress resolution is all about is getting you to a contented state of inner ease so that you are always feeling more positive, and this is the new norm. You are always above the line because you will have retrained how you respond to stress and so, if and when a stressful event occurs, it will only take a short period of time to get back above the line.
People think that stress is caused by those people out there who push their buttons. Or, their job, their manager, the traffic, financial constraints and so on, or the fact that physically their desk and computer are at the wrong height.
These types of stress are situational and can be fixed when you deal with the underlying, really deeply held stress issues that you keep repeating on a daily basis, and do not appear to understand that, that is what is happening.
You have to ask yourself: if x person keeps pushing your buttons why do you keep getting sucked into the drama and go into emotional chaos and feel bad for hours or days? When are you simply going to stop that behaviour?
Witness family disruptions. They can last for years with people seething, feeling guilt, rage, anger or resentment on an on-going basis. This keeps you stuck in the stress loop.
The interesting thing is that it has been discovered that pretty much everything you do is a habit. You think you are making decisions daily but you are not. Witness driving and you will notice that there are great chunks of time where you have not paid attention and you wonder how you have arrived at a particular spot.
Having looked at this research on Human Behaviour, and also looked specifically at the research on Habits and having examined the physiological response when a stressor trigger is activated, it was found that everyone responds the same way. However, what happens after that is that they act out behaviour based on what they have learned in their early formative years.
For example, if a person has “learned” to respond in a depressive way, a bullying way, an angry way, an anxious way, and they keep doing this throughout their life, then this pattern of behaviour becomes the new normal.
So, having looked at Habits and how they come about and what happens during this physiological response, I discovered that if you break down that response to see what happens, then you will be able to “retrain” and “unlearn” those old habits that are no longer serving you.
The initial Stress Response Mechanism and behaviour that was instilled into our psyche was that during times of real, or actual life-threatening situations, our bodies would go into a specific decision mode: will I stay and fight, will I run and flee or will I do nothing and remain stuck.
What has happened in more modern times is that we have been trained to be fearful of “imagined” or “perceived” threats during our formative years and hence these ‘fearful” responses become the new norm. We then continue to respond to stressor triggers as though our lives are in real or actual danger, thus over-loading our body/mind systems with unnecessary reactions, feelings, cortisol. We create new memories to be fearful about.
So, in my Model of Wellness – which has 5 steps, what we do in the first step, The 37 Day Stress Resolution Solution, is to repair the physiology and increase your energy and your vibration by unlocking the key to that transformation, and that is, by changing how you respond to stress. Once that is under control you will feel better on every level, you will gain more energy, you will feel back in control of your work/life balance. Being in control gives you choice. Choice gives you freedom.
So, all we do in Step 1 is alter how you respond to stress. Once that happens you will then be able to deal with those other underlying issues that also drive your emotional stress.
**When you fix the emotional stress, then everything else can be handled more easily, i.e. those situational stresses that occur daily.
The beauty of Stress Resolution Solution is that there is no guesswork about how stressed you are. There is software available that I use that measures individual stress and hence you can then monitor it and then make small adjustments so that you can change or improve. When I give a talk or a presentation I demonstrate how this works and what it is showing. The technology has been researched, tested and proven over many, many years, and the world-wide results include:
Decrease in depression by 60%
Decrease in Anxiety by 46%
Decrease in Fatigue by 50%
and many, many more benefits.
If you would like to have a chat about how this program can be implemented into your workplace, or arrange for me to give a talk to a group of interested persons, then please give me a call on: 0408 646 887 or send me an email on this personal one: personalcaoching@iinet.net.au
Best regards
Celine Healy Stress Resolution Specialist www.stresstosuccess.com.au
